Ready to Live
by mcobsessed007
Summary: Post-ep for 6x22. Beckett decides it's time to move on from the past and focus on the rest of her life with Castle. Update: Chapter 2 is Castle's perspective.
1. Chapter 1

**The entire episode was amazing and the ending was beautiful, but I wanted to explore what might have happened next in Beckett's head. It wouldn't make sense for Kate Beckett to be able to just stop thinking about her mom's murder, and I wanted to see how she might be able to let go.**

It's 2 am and you can't sleep. It's been two days since you arrested William Bracken, since you finally got justice for your mom, and you're happy and relieved, but you can't stop remembering every moment. Most of all, you keep remembering the fear. When you found out your gun was the murder weapon and IA came after you. When you came out of the bathroom to find Bracken waiting for you. When he left and you had to fight off gunmen who kept pouring vodka down your throat. When you realized one of them had broken something over your head and you were lying in the hallway bleeding. When you were brought into the station in handcuffs. When you had to wait and see if the tape would really be enough evidence to put Bracken in jail.

You want to get and go to living room and think about everything that happened, the fear and pain, the ingenious clues your mother and Montgomery left for you, the relief that you're safe from Bracken and that you didn't let your mom down, and you want to figure out what comes next, but Castle's arm is wrapped tightly around you, and you don't want to wake him.

And suddenly, none of it matters. Because you're alive and you're in Rick Castle's arms and in less than two weeks you're going to promise to spend the rest of your lives together. Because this amazing man has been with you every step of the way, helping you with every piece of the puzzle, but also bringing you flowers and holding you.

And you stop remembering the bad moments of this week. Instead you remember that Castle was mad at you for putting your life in danger. He helped you hide from IA. He stayed with you even when it was dangerous. He brought you to Michael Smith. He drove almost all the way from New York to Canada to make sure you would be safe. He went with you to DC and after Bracken was taken away, he knew the exact words you needed to hear.

You meant it, what you said to him that day. You couldn't have done it without him. You couldn't have done it without his interest in the case when you first started working together, without his insights and his persistence. But mostly, you couldn't have done any of this without his love and support, without his constant presence in your life. From the very beginning, he has refused to leave you alone. Even when you were furious and scared that he found proof that your mother's murder wasn't random, he told you that you wouldn't have to be stuck in the case alone, that he would solve it with you.

And because Castle has helped you arrest Bracken, it's time to move on. You've spent the past six weeks watching Jason Marks, and the next almost-two weeks should be spent finalizing wedding details. Your life no longer has to be about getting justice for your mom. You can truly live now, and the only person you want to create this new life with is Richard Edgar Alexander Rodgers Castle. Despite all of his irrational theories, despite his need to win at Scrabble, despite his immaturity, you want to spend every moment of your life with him. Every time he looks at you, you feel loved and special. Every time he wraps his arms around you, you feel safe and protected. After wasting so much time hiding your feelings, you're finally ready to show Castle and the entire world your undying love for and commitment to him.

And with these happy thoughts, you're ready to sleep. You lace your fingers through Castle's, and, smiling, you sink into a deep sleep next to the man you will always love and who will always love you. Always.

**Hope you enjoyed! I'm thinking about possibly writing Castle's perspective too.**


	2. Chapter 2

**I mentioned that I might to a companion piece to Ready to Live, which is about Beckett's perspective, and a few of you asked nicely, so here it is. Just some thoughts about why Castle is glad this is over.**

Six years ago, when your new muse and friend Kate Beckett told you about her mother's murder, you could see the pain and lack of closure in her eyes, even though it had been ten years. And the only experience you had with solving murders was in your novels and a few cases over the past several weeks with the NYPD, but you had to do what you could to find out what had happened to Johanna Beckett, to see if you, with your writer's eye, could spot something no one else had. And Beckett thought she knew why you were doing this, because you were curious and immature and insensitive and focused on creating your character. But really, as you admitted years later, you wanted to give Beckett answers. You wanted to try to take away her pain. This brilliant, kind, beautiful detective you were already starting to fall for spent her entire life giving others closure regarding their loved ones' untimely deaths, but could never get any herself, and this seemed incredibly unfair.

Later, you discovered that a victim had been killed by Johanna's murderer, and you could see the grief all over Beckett's face. When she hurried out of the precinct, and then when she came to the loft that night, you resolved that you would help her in any way, even if that meant doing nothing. Because it was suddenly more important that you be at Beckett's side then that she find answers. And then you had the chance to do both, when you paid to have her mother's killer caught. Because you would pay any amount of money to make Kate Beckett happy.

And suddenly, Dick Coonan was dead, and it was your fault. Beckett was trying to save you, and so she killed him before she could get any answers. You didn't want to be at the precinct anymore. You didn't want to be a constant reminder to Beckett that she had killed her only lead. But she told you that you made her life more fun, and that she would find whoever sent Coonan one day and she wanted you to be there for that. And you hoped that would happen, that she would get justice for her mother, and that you would be at her side when it happened. And part of you hoped that by the time that happened, you would be more than her partner and friend.

And all of your hopes come true. When Beckett walks outside with Bracken, you're waiting for her. And yes, your relationship has changed since then. The ring she wears on her chain now is the one you gave her by your swings, and you're two weeks away from becoming her husband. And because you're about to promise to spend the rest of your life with her, you know what she needs to hear after she puts Bracken in a police car. And you know that she needs a hug from you, just as you need one from her, to symbolize that everything is over.

And you are glad that justice has been done, that Bracken's secrets are out and he'll never be president. But mostly, you're glad he's being put away because now Kate is safe. You won't have to find her bleeding on the ground, and take care of her even as you're fighting to control your emotions and fears. And you won't have to watch her get sucked into this again. You won't have to listen to her make plans to put her life in danger just to get justice. You won't have to contact Michael Smith to figure out how to save her from Bracken. She's not going up against an invisible monster you can't stop. Maybe you'll be able to protect her from everything now. You don't have to feel helpless every time she runs after Bracken without you.

And now Beckett's life doesn't have to be about her mother's death. She can truly live now, and you're moved by the fact that her new life can start just as the two of you are preparing to start a life together.

It's been five days since she interrupted Bracken to inform him that he'd been caught, and you know that she's happy and relieved, but at first, it was clear that there was still so much on her mind. And who wouldn't spend time remembering and reflecting. But over the past few days, she's started to move on from the past, and now whenever she's not at work, she's busy finalizing wedding details or spending time with you. You've barely talked about Bracken in days, but each of you knows how the other is feeling. You can tell that she's made peace, that she's ready to move on and focus on her life with you. And you know she knows that you're happy that she's happy, that you're there for her, as you always have been.

You would have been there to support her even if the search had taken the rest of your lives, but now that it's over, you're so grateful for the thought that maybe you only need to be by her side for happy moments now, that you won't have to ever watch her destroy herself over her mother's case again. She's happy and she's about to be your beautiful bride, and no one will be able to top that wedding present.

You're both at dinner now with your mother, Alexis, and Jim, and the atmosphere is happy and excited. As soon as you came back from DC, Beckett sat down with her father and told him everything, and you told some of it to your family, and now your combined family is sitting together and enjoying the happy moments to come. You're able to finally shake yourself out of your reverie and smile at Kate. She smiles back, without a care in the world, and you're able to be excited again that you're about to be married, as you sit there with the woman you will always love, and who will always love you. Always.

**Thanks for reading!**


End file.
